A by-the-book captain is ordered to capture a strategic village in Italy. The Italian soldiers are willing to surrender, if they can have a festival first. The lieutenant convinces the captain this is the only way. Because of aerial reconnaissance, they must look like they are fighting. To sort this out an intelligence officer is sent in. Meanwhile the festival gets complicated with the mayor’s daughter.
Kansas City in the 1930s: private investigator Mike Murphy’s partner is brutally murdered when he tries to blackmail a mobster with his secret accounting records. When a rival gang boss goes after the missing records, ex-policeman Murphy is forced to team up again with his ex-partner Lieutenant Speer, even though they can’t stand each other, to fight both gangs before KC erupts in a mob war.
Felix Farmer is an extremely successful Hollywood producer, whose movies for Capitol Pictures have never lost money,… until now, with his latest, most expensive film to date, Night Wind, ending up being a major flop. The film, starring his popular Academy Award winning actress wife, Sally Miles, who has a G-rated screen image, almost bankrupts the studio. As such, the studio execs turn on Felix, who want to take over creative control of the movie and re-edit it to lessen the damage. It also turns Felix suicidal, his mental state which in turn leads to Sally leaving him and taking their two children with her. As Felix tries and tries again unsuccessfully to kill himself, he finally stumbles upon an idea which gets him out of his depression. He plans to use his and Sally’s money to purchase the movie back from the studio, and re-imagine it by adding a few new scenes, to drastically altar it from the G-rated fantasy film it is, to an R-rated sex romp, complete with Sally baring her naked breasts on screen. In doing so, Felix believes it has the potential to become the most popular film to date. A major obstacle in being able to carry out his idea is Sally, who has long protected her good girl screen image. What ends up happening is largely dictated by those around them, from the major players to those on the periphery of their lives, each who is working on his or her own self interest, with even those at the far edge of the periphery having a profound effect on the proceedings.
Ballon household: Benjamin Ballon and his wife Madame Ballon, Henri Lafarge the head Butler and his wife Madame Lafarge the Cook, Miguel Ostos the Head Chauffeur, Maria Gambrelli the third maid, Pierre the second Chauffeur and his wife Dudo the head Maid, Georges the Gardener and his wife Simone the second Maid, Maurice the second Butler. Affairs: Monsieur Ballon and Maria, Maria and Miguel, Henri and Dudo, Madame Ballon and Henri, Pierre and Simone. Who killed who: Madame Ballon accidentally shot Miguel because she suspected her husband of having an affair with Maria and wanted to kill him. Madame LaFarge killed Georges because he threatened to break up with her. Simone killed Dudo to eliminate her because she was in the way of her affair with Pierre. Monsieur Ballon killed Henri because he was having an affair with his wife. Blackmailers: Georges blackmailing Monsieur Ballon (Seen leaving Maria’s room). Maurice blackmailing Madame Ballon. (Seen leaving Maria’s room).
Steve Brooks is a sexist and the prototype macho. Unfortunately one day he is killed by one of his girlfriends. In heaven, though, there is no place for men like him and he is sent back to earth in the body of a woman so that he can see how women are treated by men like the one he once was.
In 1934 Paris, trained coloratura soprano Victoria Grant, a native Brit, can’t get a job as a singer and is having trouble making ends meet. She doesn’t even have enough money for the basics of food and shelter. Gay cabaret singer Carole ‘Toddy’ Todd may befall the same fate as Victoria as he was just fired from his singing gig at a second rate club named Chez Lui. To solve both their problems, Toddy comes up with what he considers an inspired idea: with Toddy as her manager, Victoria, pretending to be a man, get a job singing as a female impersonator. If they pull this scheme off, Toddy vows Victoria, as her male alter ego, will be the toast of Paris and as such be extremely wealthy. That alter ego they decide is Polish Count Victor Grazinski, Toddy’s ex-lover who was disowned by his family when they found out he was gay. The Count auditions for the city’s leading agent, Andre Cassell, who, impressed, gets him a gig performing in the city’s best nightclub. In the audience on the successful opening night is Chicago nightclub owner and “businessman” King Marchand, a stereotypical macho male who falls in the love with the woman he sees on stage, which doesn’t sit well with his current girlfriend, Norma Cassady. King is shocked to learn that that woman is a man named Count Grazinski. While King tries to reconcile his romantic feelings for “Victoria” (in truth, King doesn’t truly believe the Count is a man), his business associates won’t tolerate his change in sexual orientation. Although feeling emancipated being treated as a man, Victoria, as herself, in turn falls in love with King. To pursue something with him as a woman would mean giving up this lucrative career. But the career may also come to an end in a jail term if the authorities find out that Victoria and Toddy have committed fraud in this impersonation.
By a twist of fate, the clumsy, yet good-hearted aspiring actor, Hrundi V. Bakshi, is invited to Fred Clutterbuck’s big party, after ruining utterly the set of his latest feature film. However, unbeknownst to the host, Bakshi is present at the gathering, merrily mingling with the hand-picked guests in his magnificent hi-tech villa, where the drinks are flowing and everybody is in high spirits. But much to everyone’s surprise, when Bakshi accidentally has his first-ever sip of alcohol, only God knows how this well-thought party is going to end up.
Charles Dreyfus escapes from the mental asylum and tries to kill Chief Inspector Jacques Clouseau. He doesn’t succeed at first, so he takes on another strategy, namely to build a Doomsday machine and demand that someone else kills Jacques Clouseau, or Dreyfus will use the machine to wipe out whole cities and even whole countries… With about 22 assassins from all over the globe on his tail, Clouseau decides to find Dreyfus alone and put him back in the mental asylum.
The trademark of The Phantom, a renowned jewel thief, is a glove left at the scene of the crime. Inspector Clouseau, an expert on The Phantom’s exploits, feels sure that he knows where The Phantom will strike next and leaves Paris for Switzerland, where the famous Lugashi jewel ‘The Pink Panther’ is going to be. However, he does not know who The Phantom really is, or for that matter who anyone else really is…
Forty-two year old famed composer/playwright George Webber is going through a midlife crisis. He is seriously dating thirty-eight year old actress/singer Samantha Taylor, who he loves, although he admits their connection is more intellectual than it is emotional. She, in turn, loves him, despite barely tolerating his often infantile behavior. This behavior includes spying on a neighbor’s sexual encounters with a wide array of women, this spying about which the neighbor knows, as he does it himself. Driving one day, George spots a young woman who he believes is the most beautiful creature he’s ever seen – an “eleven” on a scale of ten, tens which he didn’t believe existed before her. Beyond the fact that she is probably half his age, a problem with George’s infatuation is that she is just off to her own wedding. George and Sam’s relationship takes a hit with an argument which is further exacerbated by a series of misunderstandings. As such, George decides to pursue the woman of his dreams with all his energy. He learns her name is Jenny Miles, now married Jenny Hanley, and he is able to follow her to a Mexican resort where she and her husband David Hanley are honeymooning. In his pursuit of Jenny, his encounter with a lonely woman named Mary Lewis who is vacationing at the resort, and his discussions with his gay lyricist Hugh concerning his relationship with his much younger trophy husband Larry, George may come to a clearer picture of what he is doing in Mexico, and how he truly feels about Sam.